The Disease of Self-Importance

I haven't blogged in a while, mainly because not much new has been going on at my house. We get up, get kids to school, get significant other (further known as SO) to work, and I come home and do what I can around here to lessen everyone's burden since I'm still mostly out of commission. My doctor did lift my 10-pound restriction to a 20-pound one however, and then he told me I was gaining weight. I looked at him with that 'duh' expression that comes when someone overstates the obvious. My only response was 'well I guess that's normal since I'm not BARFING all of the time'. He backed off the exercise/obesity lecture at that point, which is good. It's not like 6 weeks after brain surgery you can thrust on into major cardio. Sheesh. Hello Common Sense, where are you??!!

But this is all just a lead-in to what I really wanted to write about. I realized while I was down in said- metropolitan area with said-fabulous neurosurgeon, and while watching my SO drive there, that everyone on the roads has a serious case of the disease of self importance. It's rather astounding. On the roads, people cut you off and drive even more aggressively than in OTHER much more major metropolitan areas I've lived. It's like their journey is much more important than yours. I also saw that same behavior in stores, grocery markets, and even in the drive-thru at Starbucks, where the people where just insane and very unsafe. So here I am, in this city supposedly known for it's nice people and solid morality, and I watch those very same people act like asses at every turn. It left me wondering.....where do people contract the disease of self importance and why isn't there more attention being paid to a cure?

I'm ashamed to say that it's part my generation (X) and the following generation (Y) who are to blame for this pandemic spread. I not only see it in urban areas, but in rural ones too, where people will sit in the middle of an aisle and block it while chatting with a neighbor/friend/teacher/etc.  instead of moving their convo to the side so others can get through, or where people will literally run you over with their carts while trying to hit the freebie samples at the Costco on Saturday.

I say it's our two generations because honestly, my parents didn't teach me to act like this.  They taught me to respect others, and that the Golden Rule reigned supreme. And this was coming from un-religious people; not people ate up with quoting the Bible. It was just common sense - on the spinning wheel of life, you get back what you give. Yet somewhere along my journey, I realize that I, too, have become infected with a lesser case of self-importance syndrome. I will drive aggressively, especially when I'm home in D.C. I will put my needs above other people's at times, especially if it involves members of my family. And look at me here, blogging...sending MY thoughts out into the intar-webz instead of picking causes worthy of talking about. You know, it's funny....,I don't even realize I'm self-centered until I stop for a few minutes. Then suddenly, the realization hits me. Life is too much about ME and not enough about OTHERS who really need the attention and help, or maybe need to get passed me in the grocery aisle.

So in the end, I think the cure for this disease is remembering the Golden Rule, which frankly every belief set, excluding maybe atheism, has a version of: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Or similarly, Treat others like YOU want to be treated. There's no guarantee they will treat you that way, but at least you sent your positive help out into space - and in-so-doing, you defeated the disease of self-importance.

Halloween @ Casa de Walden (complete with a flirty 6 year old)

It's unreal how much fun my children (of all ages!) have at Halloween. They just love it! This year I had a Mario, a Flower Fairie, A Vampire/Devil, and a Grumpy Teenager. The girls went trick-or-treating with friends, so Mario (my youngest, J2) got his mum all to himself, which he seemed to greatly enjoy.

So we took Mario to the dorms at one of the local colleges that does a big trick or treating/haunted house production. It was amazing - 4 floors of cute freshman girls dressed up and handing out candy! My little J2 (he's 6) was the biggest flirt I''ve ever seen - and as a result he scored so much candy, he couldn't eat it all in a lifetime. My disgruntled teenager, who handed out candy at our house, was very sad he missed the opportunity to wander the girls' dorm of course...but he watched 'Dawn of the Dead' so apparently that made up for it - sorta. Teenagers are so weird.

My poor flower fairie had a great time trick or treating, but it ended up haunting her (no pun intended!). She ate so much candy while out wandering that she actually got physically sick! While it was a great lesson to my other kids that too much candy really will make you sick, she was worshiping the porcelain bowl for the better part of 1/2 an hour. Poor kid. Once she finally finished, she felt much better of course, but still...what a way to end a night!!

So besides the flirting, puking, walking, watching zombie movies, and trying to clean off tons of face make-up, it was a great night!! Talking to neighbors and fellow residents of the smallish town I live in, as well as enjoying watching other parents and kids, and chatting with them - it's just not something that happen every day. This is why I love Halloween - while some call it a pagan holiday and encourage Christians to stay away from it, I think the bigger benefit is repeatedly missed. While some like the gore and fear involved, most of us just really enjoy one of the few days of the year that we get to enjoy our community, and relate to it and others in it in a way we normally don't get to. People who wouldn't normally talk and enjoy each other get a chance to break down social walls and chat. Little people get to feel a sense of community and safety as they go to different homes and see that behind the doors, people are kind and really do enjoy the opportunity to see those costumes, smiles, and joy when they say 'trick-or treat'. So while I love all holidays, Halloween is one of my favorites.